By Carol Johnson on 3/4/2013 11:13 AM

The competition is out there for online dating and matchmaking! Some estimates say there are over 40 million men and women who are participating in finding a mate or date online. That means one very important thing—your profile PHOTO is your most critical factor for a great first impression and it has to be a good photo! You are 6 times more likely to be noticed if you have a good photo! This stands to reason as most people are visually oriented. This applies whether you are at the grocery store, walking on the street, or at a party. No matter the location, if you are single, you are paying attention to what someone looks like first and foremost! So, it makes sense when viewing online pictures of available men and women, your photo will either make it or break it when a “potential” mate/date is out there looking. 

Initially, forget about anyone looking beyond your photo to see your wonderful qualities and traits if: that picture is blurry, does not enhance your features, you had a bad hair day, you are not wearing appropriate clothing or make-up (ladies), etc... These are just some of the many ways to insure you won’t get noticed! Pay very close attention to the guidelines that are listed below in order to capitalize on someone looking further at you because you had an incredible photo!

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By Steven Ward on Sunday, November 18, 2012

There have been countless studies and works of literature along with volumes of scientific research into what attracts men and women to one another. Whether a personally satisfactory explanation can be found in evolutionary biology, psychology, anthropology, humanities, spirituality, religion or all of the above really makes no difference, because when it comes to attraction its truly "to each their own".

There are qualities and traits more or less important to everyone looking for love. Some are physical, some intrinsic, some perceived and  some, well, downright superficial.

When considering how to attract someone you'd consider attractive you must first disregard what you think makes you attractive and consider what they find attractive. It's easy to guess. It's easier to assume. But there is nothing more telling than first hand accounts from qualified critics; that is, the people you find attractive. What follows are five tips to to be as attractive as you can be...to those you're attracted to. 

By Carol Johnson on 10/30/2012 1:29 PM

"Asking for help does not mean that we are weak or incompetent. It usually indicates an advanced level of honesty and intelligence." -Anne Wilson Schaef, 1990

I am sure you have heard and witnessed the cliché that most men do not like asking for directions or asking for help on many things at all. It is equally true that many women don’t like asking for help and especially when it involves the caretaking role of others. So does asking for help imply that we are weak? Does it suggest that we somehow are not able to care for ourselves or others that we care about? Do these questions in the purest sense sound silly? They should! Pride, ego and guilt get in the way. These emotions take hold and prevent us from seeing and seeking the assistance we need in order to help ourselves and others. Take the airline example of the stewardess/steward reminding us “in the event that oxygen is released and you have children (or elderly) you should put the mask on yourself first.  This makes perfect sense, right? You cannot...

By Carol Johnson on 9/21/2012 9:09 AM

Singles who are struggling to find someone they can have a healthy long term relationship or marriage with will reason that it is because they just don’t know how to choose the right person. Is it really because they don’t know how to pick the right person or is it because they stay too long in a relationship that is not right for them? I believe they have the ability to choose someone they are attracted to, but lack the intrinsic understanding to make the decision on when to leave if it does not work out or becomes unhealthy emotionally or otherwise. How do you know when to stay in or leave a relationship no matter how long you have been dating? It all depends on your ability, knowledge, and/or skill to read the signs, signals and patterns of one that is not working for you. You can develop the skill by knowing what the red flags and traps are and then becoming your own detective in learning how to recognize them when they appear. 

Traps are those situations where you say to yourself “I don’t feel like...

By Kate Forest on 9/11/2012 8:01 AM

If it’s been a while since you’ve been on a date then your dating muscles might be atrophying. Your flirting skills might be rusty. Your conversation might be a little dull. Like any skill that has sat dormant the ability to date effectively needs a little stretching and flexing before getting back up to full speed. Remember not to overdo it the first time you start dating. Keep your first dates short and light--coffee or drinks. Plan for only forty-five minutes to an hour. Don’t go for a marathon date at a five star restaurant with a four course meal that will take three hours. That kind of date puts too much pressure on strangers. Few people can carry conversation for that long, especially people who don’t know each other well.

Practice flirting in low risk situations. If you haven’t been flirty in over a year, you might feel awkward at first holding her gaze or lightly touching his arm. Practice verbally flirting with the girl at the gym, or the guy you see at the coffee shop in the morning. If it...

By Carol Johnson on 8/29/2012 9:49 AM

What is the definition of “older?” If you are a woman, it can mean past the age of recommended child-bearing. If you are a man, you may feel it is the strike of the “mid-life crisis.” In the U.S., baby boomers are considered “old.” So, at what age is old? It may be that it is an event of the mind, body or both. Mark Twain said, “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” Or, you can look at it like George Burns did: “You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get (be) old.” 

If you have found yourself at this place in life and that you are single for whatever the reason, you may be struggling with how to get back into the dating scene, but have a 20-year old memory of how it was then. Fast forward the flashback into the present and soak up some simple and very important tips for sliding into dating today with ease using the following tips:



“Do what you love and the love will come.” I read this quote in an article by Mike Harden (2004) and immediately...

By Stephanie Florman on 8/22/2012 1:46 PM

“Trying to prove how good we are, trying to prove we’re good enough, trying to show someone how much he or she has hurt us, trying to show someone we’re understanding, are warning signs that we may be into self-defeating behaviors.”  ~Melody Beattie 

At Master Matchmakers we know that anyone who is searching for “the one” has entered the “self-defeating” behavior zone so we designed our coaching program to emphasize self-care.  Self-care is about congruency.  It is the practice of aligning your thoughts, feelings, words and actions with your values and goals.

Practicing self-care is so powerful because the relationship you have with yourself is the foundation for every other relationship in your life.  If you are having trouble “finding, dating and keeping the one”, then I encourage you to consider where you may be out of alignment.

As you go throughout your day, start by shifting the focus from “them” to “you”.  Take responsibility.  Your personal power depends on it.  Own your thoughts, your feelings, what you say and the actions you take.  Once you own it, you can change it.

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By Steven Ward on Thursday, August 16, 2012

Is it? I’ve been inspired to write this by some things I happened across on the graph. “The graph” is the new vernacular for the more anachronistic term “online”. I couldn’t help but chime in. One of these things was a seemingly innocuous Facebook status update from a high school friend of mine directed toward his wife, and the other, a rigorous Twitter debate over polyamory, a word unrecognized by Webster’s thesaurus, but defined as “the state or practice of having more than one open romantic relationship at a time.” I woke up one morning ready to start my day. I already caught up on email while travelling from my bed, to my bathroom, to my kitchen with my phone in tow and sat down at my computer with a coffee in hand ready to do what I always do first thing in the morning, open my web browser and check my social networks. As I read my Facebook newsfeed I came across a status update from an old friend of mine to his wife, “Cant wait to see you tonight for a couple of hours before you leave your boys again :(“....

By Stephanie Florman on 8/14/2012 12:13 PM

Clients reach out to us because they need help in their love life.  They take the step, make the call, and get ready to get started and…

·         Their ex (that is an ex for a reason) comes back into the picture

·         They experience a health concern or financial setback that requires immediate attention

·         Their schedule becomes unusually busy (with other people's business)

No matter what that something is, it has the potential to stop our potential client from moving forward.  This is the nature of sabotage.

Consciously you know you want a healthy and happy relationship, but unconsciously you probably have some negative beliefs about relationships:

Maybe you’ve been hurt, betrayed or rejected or seen too many people in unhealthy or unhappy relationships  Maybe you’ve experienced tremendous loss and do not want to go through the pain again Maybe you have grown comfortable with your life as it is and fear it will change While we don’t know...

By Kate Forest on 8/6/2012 9:56 AM

It’s been said a thousand times, trumpeted from every advice column and TV show. Yet I still find clients wondering why their partners don’t change. Somehow they believe the magic of a romantic relationship will free their boy/girlfriend from destructive behavior.

It won’t. If anything, by remaining in a relationship with someone who displays inappropriate behavior you only encourage them to continue.

The behavior doesn’t even have to be inappropriate. A recent client complained to me about her boyfriend who is terrible at planning. She never knows if/when they will see each other. This activates her abandonment issues from her childhood. She tried again and again to explain her abandonment issues to her boyfriend and asked him again and again to be more considerate of her feelings and be more planful.

Ideally, this man would learn to plan like most adults with busy lives and make conscious room in his life for the woman he professes love for. But he’s not going to change because of her abandonment...