Today ChristianMingle.com and Jdate.com released their Second Annual State of Dating in America™ Report. Although the conclusions were validating they were disheartening. When I was, Steve Ward, Host and Executive Producer of VH1 Tough Love, I was used to interacting with and trying to understand the minds of the most romantically depraved people we could find. As Steven Ward, the CEO of Master Matchmakers and the Founder of Love Lab I have seen how the most authentic and genuine singles are impacted by the trends highlighted in this report.
What was once considered the most socially unacceptable behavior is becoming more and more the norm. Here are just some highlights.
- “Eighty-six percent of men and 92 percent of women consider having sex with another person repeatedly as being unfaithful in a relationship.”
You read that correctly. There are nearly 1 in 8 men and 1 in 10 women that think this is acceptable.
- “In 2014, 90 percent of women, vs. 100 percent in 2013, agree passionately kissing someone else is cheating. The number decreases for men as well, with only 75 percent agreeing vs. 86 percent in 2013.”
Compare these two statistics. In 2013 eighty-six percent of men thought passionately kissing was cheating. In 2014 eighty-six percent of men think having sex with another person repeatedly, is what's considered unfaithful. Hell only 3/4 men think passionately kissing another person is unfaithful. Lovely.
And look at how women’s expectations have changed in a year. Last year, 100% considered repeated sex with another person as the definition of unfaithful. Now its 92% and there isn’t a huge drop-off when it comes to making out. Only 2% less women consider passionately kissing someone else while in a relationship is the standard of infidelity.
What that means is that roughly 1/10 women condone this behavior! That’s why men pull these stunts! It’s like the odds of hitting a black number in the third column on a roulette wheel. Place your bets.
- “Cheating is not always a deal breaker. Nearly a quarter of singles would consider marrying someone who was unfaithful to them while dating.”
Obviously it’s easier to forgive than to forget. There’s a difference between abruptly breaking up with someone because you want to play the field and knowingly deceiving them to meet your own selfish needs. But it appears THAT is what many people have forgotten.
- “Is this a date? Sixty-nine percent of singles are at least somewhat confused about whether their outing with someone they're interested in is in fact a date or not."
C’mon people. Make your intentions known. And what’s wrong with having a modest first date? It’s still a date. How about a coffee date versus a dinner date? Here is the definition of a date. You arrange a time to meet one another at a designated place. He does the planning. She goes with the flow. Unless it’s a declarative “group date” its between just Him and Her. He should pay. She should offer to pick up the tab if she has no interest in seeing him again, split the tab if she’s doubtful, or offer to leave a tip if she’d like to see Him again.
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