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About the Author: Steve Ward
Steve Ward is the Owner and CEO of Master Matchmakers and a second-generation matchmaker who built the firm alongside his mother and co-founder JoAnn Ward. He hosted and executive-produced VH1's Tough Love for six seasons, co-authored Crash Course in Love (Simon & Schuster), and has been featured as a dating expert by CNN, the Today Show, Oprah, Glamour, People, and Cosmopolitan. He has spent more than 25 years personally coaching and matching relationship-minded singles nationwide.
Quick answer: Master Matchmakers is built to pass a specific test: a person sources and interviews every candidate, checks run before you see a profile, you get a photo and a phone call before meeting, and the starting fee, $3,500, is stated before any consultation. Apply the same checks to any firm you are weighing.
Search "top matchmaking services" and you get roughly the same page nine different ways: a list of five to ten firms, a paragraph of praise under each name, and no way to tell whether anyone checked anything before ranking them. Some of those lists are built by a firm ranking itself first. Others are paid placements dressed up as editorial.
I run Master Matchmakers, and I am not adding another ranked list to that pile. What separates a top-tier matchmaking service from a firm that only looks like one is not its position on somebody's countdown. It is a short set of practices you can check yourself, on a firm's own site or in a first phone call, before you pay a cent. Here is that test, and how to run it on any firm.
What "Top Tier" Actually Means
"Top matchmaking service" gets used two different ways online. One is a ranking: somebody's opinion of which firm to try first. The other is a standard: a set of practices that separates a firm actually doing the work from one that only reads that way in its own copy. A ranking changes depending on who wrote it and who paid to be on it. A standard does not, and you can confirm it yourself.
Who Actually Sources Your Candidates
The first question worth asking is not how large a firm's network is, but who goes looking on your behalf once you sign up. A firm that actively sources candidates has a person searching for people who fit what you described, inside its existing client base and outside it. A firm that can only introduce you to whoever already happens to be a paying member is running a narrower search than the fee suggests.
At Master Matchmakers, sourcing starts with a personal consultation, then a matchmaker goes looking from there. Ask any firm you are considering the same direct question: do you go find candidates for me, or do I meet whoever is already on your list? A specific answer describing an actual search process is a good sign. An answer that only describes network size is answering a different question.
Who Interviews Them, and When
Sourcing a name is not the same as vetting the person behind it. Ask who interviews a candidate before they become eligible to be introduced to anyone, and whether that happens once, or every time. A firm where a coordinator runs a short intake call is doing something different from one where the person representing you also personally interviews the other side.
Every person eligible for introduction through Master Matchmakers is interviewed as part of the verification process, alongside identity, age, and photo checks and a criminal and public-record background check. That check alone is close to table stakes at this end of the industry. Worth confirming is whether the interview happens before someone is offered to a client, or only after something has gone wrong.
What Gets Checked, and When You Learn It
Ask two separate questions here, because firms answer them differently. What actually gets checked: identity, age, photos, a background check, or only whatever the person volunteered. And when you learn the results: before you ever hear a name, or only after you have already agreed to meet.
Background checks are common enough near the top of this industry that having one is not, by itself, a differentiator anymore. Timing is. A firm that verifies someone and tells you what it found before the introduction is handing you a decision. A firm that verifies afterward, or only on request, is handing you a name and asking you to trust it.
Whether You See a Photo and Talk to Someone First
This is the question most worth testing directly, because firms genuinely differ on it. Ask plainly: before I agree to meet someone, do I see a real photo, and can I speak with them by phone first? Some firms answer yes to both. Some set up a blind introduction instead, a name and a time with nothing else, on the theory that too much information beforehand gets in the way of chemistry.
Neither approach is dishonest on its own. A firm running blind introductions is not hiding anything if it tells you that is the model. What matters is whether it tells you before you pay, not after. Master Matchmakers does not run blind introductions: you review a verified profile and speak with someone by phone before agreeing to meet, a deliberate choice, not an industry default.
What Happens When a Search Stalls
Every search hits a quiet stretch. What separates a top-tier firm is not that it never happens, but what the firm does about it. Ask specifically: after a few introductions that did not lead anywhere, does your matchmaker change what they are looking for based on your feedback, or do you keep receiving the same type of introduction regardless of what you have told them?
A firm that treats a stall as information asks what went wrong and adjusts the search from there. A firm that treats it as a delivery quota keeps sending introductions to stay current on the contract, whether or not any of them fit. Post-date feedback exists for exactly this reason: it is the mechanism that is supposed to change the next introduction, and you can ask a firm to describe, specifically, how that happens.
Whether the Fee Is Stated Before or After a Consultation
Price is the question most people ask first, and it is the least useful one on its own. A four-figure fee and a six-figure retainer can both come with a real, verified process, or with none at all. What a top-tier fee disclosure looks like is not a specific number. It is whether a firm tells you what you will pay before you sit through a sales consultation, or only after.
Selective Search and Kelleher International sit at the expensive end of this industry, worth mentioning for one reason: price alone does not answer any of the questions above, not even for the firms charging the most. Selective Search's own site states a retained search runs $50,000 to $500,000, into seven figures for a complex one. Kelleher International publishes a comparable range. Neither fact says whether either firm sources actively, interviews first, or shows you a photo before you meet. It just tells you when you find out what you owe.
Master Matchmakers states its starting fee, $3,500, publicly, before any consultation, and the total varies from there with the scope of the search. We go into what a matchmaker actually costs in more detail elsewhere. What matters for this test is not that our number is smaller than Selective Search's. It is that you know it before you talk to anyone.
Side by side, a checkable answer against a vague one, question by question.
| What to ask | A checkable answer | A vague one |
| Who sources candidates? | Actively searched for, on and off our existing list | You'll be matched from our network |
| Who interviews them first? | Your matchmaker, before they're ever offered | Our team handles intake for everyone |
| What's checked, and when? | Identity, age, photos, background, reported before you meet | Checks are part of our process |
| Photo and a call before meeting? | Yes, a verified profile and a phone call first | You'll learn more once you're both there |
| What happens if a search stalls? | Feedback changes the search, and they can say how | We'll keep the introductions coming |
| Fee stated before or after a consultation? | Published upfront, before you talk to anyone | Let's set up a call to discuss investment |
Judge the Firm, Not the List
None of the six questions above depend on which article, directory, or star rating led you to a firm. A ranked list can only tell you what someone else thinks; a test you run yourself tells you what is actually true. Sorting a genuine review from a fake one is a related but separate question, and we cover how to judge a matchmaking service review on its own.
Whichever firm you end up asking these questions of, and whether or not it is us, ask them plainly and expect specific answers back. A firm that can describe its own sourcing, interviewing, verification, and fee structure in one phone call is telling you something true. A firm that answers in adjectives instead of specifics is telling you something too.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is the actual test for a top-tier matchmaking service?
A top-tier matchmaking service can answer six questions: who sources your candidates, who interviews them, what gets verified and when you learn it, whether you see a photo and speak by phone first, what changes when a search stalls, and whether the fee is stated before a consultation.
Does the most expensive matchmaking service automatically qualify as top tier?
No. Price signals what a firm charges, not how it operates. Selective Search's own site states a retained search runs $50,000 to $500,000. Kelleher International publishes a comparable range. Neither fact says whether either firm sources, interviews, or verifies before an introduction.
How can you tell whether a matchmaker actively sources candidates or just introduces existing members?
Ask directly: outside your existing client list, do you go looking for people who fit what I described, or do I only meet whoever already joined? A firm that actively sources describes a specific search process. A firm relying on its existing pool describes its database size instead, a different answer.
Is a blind introduction, with no photo or call beforehand, a sign of a lower-quality matchmaking service?
Not automatically. Some firms disclose upfront that they run blind introductions, and treat that as part of the process. What matters is whether a firm tells you which model you are buying before you pay for it, not after. A firm that stays vague about that is the actual warning sign.
What should a matchmaking service do after a few introductions do not work out?
A top-tier firm treats a stalled search as information, not a delivery schedule. Expect your matchmaker to ask what specifically did not fit, adjust what they look for based on that answer, and describe the change before the next introduction. If nothing changes after feedback, the search is not being managed.